There's a song these days that I just can't get out of my head. It's called "Healing Begins" By Tenth Avenue North. I keep listening to it over and over again.
Well... go listen for yourself:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BFUHrXfuNU4
Seriously powerful, right? At least I think it is. Every time I hear this I think of my weight loss journey.
You know, when your fat... I mean really fat, not just overweight - you are hurt - you are broken inside...you feel trapped, and then you develop defense mechanisms so you don't get hurt. You stay away from people and crowds, you don't look in the mirror - I mean REALLY look in the mirror, you don't weigh yourself. You put up a wall to block the world. That way you don't have to deal with the fact that your fat. At least this is how it is for me. Yes, I said is. I am working on my perception. I am working on tearing down the walls I built up around myself for so long. That takes even longer than actually losing the physical weight. There is so much emotional weight too, and some days getting rid of it is even harder. Lately, though, when I hear this song I feel a wave of healing wash over me. I feel free.
Healing Begins - Ten Avenue North
So you thought you had to keep this up
All the work that you do
So we think that you're good
And you can't believe it's not enough
All the walls you built up
Are just glass on the outside
So let 'em fall down
There's freedom waiting in the sound
When you let your walls fall to the ground
We're here now
This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark
Afraid to let your secrets out
Everything that you hide
Can come crashing through the door now
But too scared to face all your fear
So you hide but you find
That the shame won't disappear
So let it fall down
There's freedom waiting in the sound
When you let your walls fall to the ground
We're here now
We're here now, oh
This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark
Sparks will fly as grace collides
With the dark inside of us
So please don't fight
This coming light
Let this blood come cover us
His blood can cover us
This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark
That is a nice song. I'd never even heard of Tenth Avenue North before this post.
ReplyDeleteOur psychology is what gets us in this mess in the first place. Only when that shifts, will we be able to change our bodies and the way we see them. Some people just don't "get it". They think that everything magically gets solved by calorie counting, with no real appreciation for why they ended up where they did. I'm glad that you are someone that looks deeper.
While you may feel that you have a little way to go in regaining emotional balance, the fact that youy are aware of it, puts you in a good position to make progress.
All the best :)